My chili recipe

Not all chili recipes have to smell like armpits and farts.

I always have an appetite for my low fat chili recipe.

This makes 4 portions.

Ingredients:
* 400-500g of the leanest beef mince you can afford.
* 1 onion. (I prefer a red onion as it is milder and looks awesome, but white onions can be a lot cheaper. If it is too strong, try running it under cold water when peeled).
* An enormous carrot, or 2-3 little ones.
* 1 or 2 celery sticks.
* 100-200g of mushrooms.
* A pepper. I prefer green as red peppers don't like me.
* A tin of chopped tomatoes. The cheap supermarket range one is fine.
* A tin of kidney beans. The cheap supermarket range one is fine for this too.
* A generous dash of Lea & Perrins.
* A bay leaf or two.
* Dried chili flakes or chili powder. If you can afford fresh chillies, I'd have 2-3 fresh chillies, deseeded.
* Mixed herbs.
* Lime juice. I keep a bottle of lime juice in the fridge, or use the juice of a fresh lime if you've got one or are feeling flush this month.
* Some cherry tomatoes, or another tin of tomatoes if you like it tomato-ey!
* Some tomato puree if you like a thick sauce.
* Whatever else vegetables you have in the fridge.
* 320g of rice per person. Brown rice is tasty.

For a veggie version, swap beef mince for quorn mince and leave out the Lea & Perrins. It has anchovies in.

To cook:
Put rice on in one pan.

Brown mince in another pan. Use a spray oil to save calories if you can.
If using quorn mince, add a little water or put in the tinned tomatoes early. Quorn mince can be quite "thirsty".

Chop up the onion and add.

Chop up the carrots, pepper, celery and add.

Add the tinned tomatoes.

Add the herbs, bay leaves, chili, lea & perrins and lime juice to your taste.
If you're using fresh chillies, I would recommend putting a plastic bag over your hands so it doesn't hurt when you touch sensitive places later, like eyes or genitals.

Stir thoroughly.

Rinse the kidney beans, then add them.

Add in any vegetables you want to use up from the fridge.

Wash and chop mushrooms, then add.

Halve and add cherry tomatoes if you want them.

Add tomato puree to thicken to sauce if you want.

Once the rice is done, serve and enjoy!